“MOM we have discussed this. You may not post anything without my consent.” These words, posted on Instagram by 14-year-old Apple Martin in response to an image of her shared by her mum, Gwyneth Paltrow, have reignited the debate over whether it is ever OK to put pictures of your children online.
Apple’s words could become a common refrain as the current generation of children grows up. Many of them will have had digital footprints before they could even walk. About 98 per cent of mothers and 89 per cent of fathers report having uploaded photos of their child to Facebook, according to a 2012 US study.
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Concerns mainly revolve around two issues. First, safety. According to Australia’s eSafety commission, . The advice is simple. Don’t post photos of your child in a state of undress, and avoid images in which their school uniform or location is identifiable, which could leave them vulnerable to grooming, says UK children’s charity, the NSPCC. Avoid posting personal information to minimise risk of identity theft, and ensure that your privacy settings are strict. You might also consider using a pet name for your child online, making it harder to link information to them.
“Many parents value the emotional support of sharing anecdotes, but our children may not thank us”
A second issue, as Apple astutely notes, is that of consent. What would your child want to see about themselves online in the future? Videos of them mid-temper tantrum may be amusing now – but could be used by bullies. Given that employers often use social networking sites to research candidates, it is also worth considering how they might view such information.
Even seemingly innocuous photos may become a source of conflict in the future, depending on your child’s disposition or your changing relationship with them.
Of course, certain photos are likely to be more problematic than others: an embarrassing birthmark; that time your toddler smeared faeces all over the floor. Many parents value the support that online sharing of parental struggles can bring. But our children may not thank us for it.
