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Ever had the sense that everyone else is an idiot? Maybe that’s a tad overblown, but when it comes to smarts, looks, charisma and general psychological adjustment, there’s no denying you are a cut above the average person in the street. Or on the road: have you seen how those jerks drive?

Well, here’s the bad news. Pretty much everyone else is thinking the same thing.

The phenomenon of self-enhancement – viewing ourselves as above average – , professions and , and to capabilities from driving to playing chess. It does have advantages. People who are more impressed with themselves tend to make better first impressions, be generally happier and may even . High self-estimation : anthropologist , argues that when we’ve tricked ourselves, we don’t have to work so hard to trick others, too.

Confidence also helps in finding a romantic partner, and so in reproduction. When it comes to overestimating our looks, we’re all at it – although men are on average worse offenders than women. According to a study earlier this year by Marcel Yoder of the University of Illinois in Springfield and his colleagues, : they accurately assess other people’s lesser perception of them, while persisting in a more positive perception of themselves.

“Men have a ‘frog prince’ delusion: persisting in a positive self-perception”

The real downsides come when you’re less aware of how others perceive you. If you are self-confident without being self-aware, you are likely to be seen as a jerk. “It’s hard to come off as humble or modest when you’re clueless about how other people see you,” says Yoder. Plus we may make bad decisions on the basis of an inflated sense of expertise or understanding.

Particularly in the political arena, our “bias blind spot” – a belief that our world view is based on objective truth, while everyone else is a deluded fool – , especially as the echo chamber of social media exposes us to fewer contrary views. “It can make opposing parties feel that the other side is too irrational to be reasoned with,” says , who studies communication at Washington State University in Pullman.

So how can we preserve the good while avoiding the downsides? Different strategies and training programmes do exist for overcoming our inbuilt biases. Most begin by simply making people aware of them and how they can affect our decision-making.

At home, we can use an exercise that psychologists call “perspective-taking”. This amounts to trying to see a dispute from the other person’s point of view, says , who studies decision-making at City University of London. She also points out that acting when you’re all riled up – in a state of high emotion – only entrenches your bias. “We know how to make unbiased decisions, but often emotion pushes us, or we aren’t willing to put in the effort,” she says. But then comes the good news: “practice can make us better.”

This article appeared in print under the headline “You are… a fantasist”