FEEDBACK is thoroughly in favour of honest labelling. So we are delighted with the product that Lyn Hoare obtained: a 125-millilitre aerosol of from Boots The Chemists. The blurb on the can reminds us that “Sensitive skin needs extra care throughout the day, which is why this gentle facial spritz is specially formulated to refresh and hydrate.” Lovely. How does it work? “Hypoallergenic and fragrance-free, it instantly cools and freshens skin, helping protect it from the drying effects of central heating and air conditioning. Lanolin free. Dermatologically tested.”
All these claims are incontestably true: Hoare was astonished to read that the can contains just one thing – “aqua”, which is ingredient-speak for water. She is just glad that it was a free gift from the shop. Paying £3.99 for an aerosol can of water seems somewhat excessive. In future she’s going to fill a pump dispenser from the tap.
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THERE Martin Horwood was, sitting at his computer, when the calendar window of his Microsoft Outlook office program started scrolling uncontrollably back through time. He watched, helpless, as it zoomed back through two world wars, past the Great Reform Act of 1832, the French revolution and American independence – stopping only in the 1760s when, he guesses, a frantic IT worker somewhere in the bowels of the famous London building he works in must have fixed the network glitch.
Naturally, Horwood was intrigued to see how far back in time he could personally make Outlook’s calendar go. Trying to view even earlier dates, he got stuck at All Fool’s day 1601. Putting this into a famous web search engine revealed no special event in history that day. It did, however, provide a link to a “rather weird” website devoted to the work of a genealogist named John Mayer at . This notes that “Outlook provides a series of perpetual calendars covering something less than 2898 years, from 1 April 1603 to 29 August 4500,” but that users can manually scroll back to 1601.
Feedback’s further searches suggest that 1 April 1601 was declared the beginning of time by the authors of the COBOL computer-programming language beloved of banks – who are presumably not that interested in pre-capitalist dates. And with that we return to our allotted task of gathering further trivia, while Martin Horwood MP returns to his of representing the citizens of Cheltenham in the famous building called the House of Commons.
ANOTHER quantum sign (Feedback, 7 July). Tim Gomersall and Jerry Huxtable both report seeing a sign in France that raises interesting dimensional and philosophical issues. In the centre of the town of Moutiers there is a signpost that points in two directions. One points to the right and says “Toutes directions”. The other points to the left and says “Autres directions”. If all directions are covered by the first one, Gomersall argues, how can there be other directions left over for the second?
In addition, Gomersall reports that when he was skiing in the Alps he saw, on the middle of a piste in Meribel, a signpost marked only “Attention: Signe”. This had been thoughtfully translated underneath as “Danger: Sign” for the seasonal anglophone population of the valley.
“THE postcard from NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in California that Kathlyn Powell received announced “July – Public Lectures on Mars”. She wonders how well attended they were”
Given that there appeared to be no risks to skiers in the vicinity apart from running into the sign itself, this struck Gomersall as a fine example of something creating its own purpose.
FINALLY, we stated on 30 June that several readers had sent us what appeared to be a photograph of a sign outside Northampton General Hospital saying “Family Planning Advice – use rear entrance”. We appealed to readers to help us decide whether the photo was genuine or a fake.
Things still aren’t totally certain. One reader wrote to say: “I was born and raised in Northampton, and can verify the existence of the sign. Given its advice, though, it’s amazing that I was born at all.”
However, Theo Fenton tells us: “The public relations department at Northampton General Hospital (NGH) issued the following statement to its employees: ‘I am sure many of you will be aware of a spoof NGH directional sign for a family planning clinic that is being widely circulated via email and the internet. Although it is amusing, it is a hoax. We do not provide a family planning clinic at NGH.'”
A spokesperson for Northampton General Hospital confirms that such a memo was indeed sent out last year, so on balance it looks like the hoax theory is right. Meanwhile, Fenton and several other readers tell us that there is a sign “that really might exist” at Southampton General Hospital reading “Maternity Department – Deliveries at Rear”. So now we want to know: does that one exist or not?